Marty Eisenberg (Battle Guy)

battleguyfilmWell, let’s face another central character in Kick-Ass 2, this time a character we’ve been knowing since the first movie: Marty Eisenberg, portrayed by Clark Duke. In the first film, he was one of Dave Lizewski‘s best (and only) friends, and also the one who unwillingly gives Dave the idea of becoming a real life superhero. In the second one, we find him in quite a different role, having become the (not so) heroic Battle Guy, a renowned member of Justice Forever. He put up a fake origin story, foiled by his best friend when he joined the team, and he proved to be quite an unuseful member, until, along with the Ass-Kicker, he managed to do something in the final battle against The Toxic Mega Cunts (actually, Ass-Kicker did everything, but nevermind). Anyway, let’s see who Marty is in the comics.

Marty Eisenberg had always been a loser: a total nerd, he was only able to speak about superheroes, movies and tv series, and only with his two best friends, Dave Lizewski and Todd Haynes, whom he knew since they were seven-years-old children. When in high school, Marty, battleguycomics1Dave and Todd spent most of their time discussing about their favourite comicbooks, taking matters such as who was stronger between The Hulk and The Thing very seriously. During one of their discussions in a direct market, Dave asked his friends why nobody ever thought to be a real superhero, somebody who could actually protect people in the streets. Marty at first mocked his friend, believing it was just some silly fantasy. Then, Kick-Ass appeared, a real life superhero, and, despite he got almost killed on his first night out, he became a popular idol on his second, nine months after. Marty became Kick-Ass’ number one fan, without suspecting that the hero’s secret identity was actually his best friend Dave. Time passed, and Kick-Ass became more and more famous. When the superhero defeated, along with Hit-Girl and Big Daddy, the criminal organization of John Genovese, Marty finally decided Dave’s idea wasn’t something stupid at all, and he put up his mind: he would have become a superhero just like Kick-Ass.

Taking inspiration from Captain America‘s costume, Marty created the Battle Guy persona, and tailored a blue suit with stars on it. Armored with a couple of twin shields on his foreharms, Marty started patroling the streets (actually, he just walked around, fleeing at the first danger). He met the guys from Justice Forever, and became a member of the team. He put up some Batman-styled origin story, telling his parents had been killed by a cannibal while coming back from the Opera, and eaten just before his eyes, with the psycho mocking his mother’s fat ass while chewing it. The killer then stole their credit cards and used them in a pay-per-view porn, being arrested only some time after. The story was far too gruesome and unlikely, but Colonel Stars believed him, and Battle Guy entered Justice Forever. When Doctor Gravity brought Kick-Ass in the team, Dave battleguycomics2recognized Marty’s voice, and, while the two recognized and greeted each other, it became clear for every single hero or heroine in Justice Forever that his origin story was absolutely fake. Battle Guy received an admonition by Colonel Stars, but he was allowed to stay. Along with Dave and the rest of the team, Marty participated to many battles (without doing anything, actually), until The Mother Fucker appeared. The biggest contribution Marty lent to Kick-Ass was letting him stay to his place while his father was in jail, framed by the Mother Fucker. During the final battle in Time Square, Battle Guy and the Ass-Kicker (Todd Haynes in his heroic identity) unadvertently helped Hit-Girl defeat and kill Mother Russia, thus winning the battle. Marty was the only one, along with Todd and Dave, to escape arrest. Six months after the battle, Marty apparently gave up on his superhero career, and, after graduating from high school, he entered Harvard University to become a doctor.

Marty Eisenberg is a very intelligent guy, but also a total nerd, with no popularity at all and no specific talent apart from studying and knowing everything about comicbooks. Also in his heroic identity, Battle Guy, he proves to be completely useless on the battlefield, showing more than once more than a glimpse of cowardice. A good friend nevertheless, Marty is just not somebody born to be a hero.

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4 Comments

  1. […] by Augustus Prew. In the movie, he becomes jealous the moment he realizes his friends Dave and Marty hide something from him (their superhero lives, actually), and then he becomes a superhero […]

  2. […] possibility of reply. She was also a classmate of Dave Lizewski and his friends, Todd Haynes and Marty Eisenberg, three total losers she barely considered human beings. Dave, on the opposite, had quite a major […]

  3. […] Mother Fucker was an idiot to fear a little kid. During the battle, anyway, she got distracted by Battle Guy and the Ass-Kicker, and she turned her back to Hit-Girl, her first and last mistake: taking […]

  4. […] the vengeful Night Bitch, the self-claiming professor Doctor Gravity and the completely useless Battle Guy. It was much to Bertolinni’s satisfaction that, soon after the beginning of Justice […]


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