Todd Haynes (Ass-Kicker)

asskickerfilmAlmost at the end of Kick-Ass 2 characters (if I forget somebody, please tell me). Today, we’ll see the other one of Dave Lizewski‘s best friends, Todd Haynes, portrayed by Augustus Prew. In the movie, he becomes jealous the moment he realizes his friends Dave and Marty hide something from him (their superhero lives, actually), and then he becomes a superhero himself, with the not-so-original name Ass-Kicker. In the film he also has a costume identical to Kick-Ass‘ one, with inverted colors. He joins The Mother Fucker, but comes back to his friends the moment he understands how serious things have become. He also appeared in the first movie, this time portrayed by Evan Peters, but he was nothing more than a secondary character. Now, let’s see who Todd is in the comics.

Todd Haynes had been best friends with Dave Lizewski and Marty Eisenberg since they were all seven years old. They grew up together, attended school together, became nerds together. A comicbook reader, Todd spent most of his time discussing about superheroes with Dave and Marty, complaining about Galactus‘ rendering in the new Fantastic Four movie or stuff like that. One day followed the other, all the same: a total loser at school, somebody only in a comicbook store with his friends, until the day the first real life superhero appeared: asskickercomics1Kick-Ass. Todd was thrilled by the news, and, along with Marty, he became Kick-Ass’ number one fan. Suddenly, comicbook nerds weren’t so unpopular anymore, since superheroes had become the new trend. Todd didn’t know that, behind Kick-Ass’ mask, there was his life-long friend Dave, and he thought that his friend spent less time with him and Marty because of some sort of weird relation he put up with Katie Deauxma, the girl he had a crush on. At a certain point, also Marty started disappearing, and Todd found himself alone without knowing why. Finally, the truth was revealed, and both Dave and Marty told their friend they were superheroes: Kick-Ass and Battle Guy. The two of them invited Todd to create his own masked persona, and to join them in the ranks of Justice Forever, the supergroup they were all part of. Todd enthusiastically accepted, but his friends’ reactions to his ideas were less than positive. His costume, according to Marty, looked like a suit for homosexual marriage promotion, while Dave criticized the names Todd came up with: Doctor Kick-AssKick-Ass Man and so on looked far too similar, for him, to his own. Eventually, Todd chose the name Ass-Kicker (much more original…) and joined Justice Forever.

The Ass-Kicker joined the team in the worst moment possible. He trained only once with the team, since in those days The Mother asskickercomics2Fucker had started a personal war against Kick-Ass. Justice Forever’s leader, Colonel Stars, was killed, and many heroes were arrested by the police, more than intentioned to put an end to the vigilantism phenomenon. Todd also suffered an attack from The Toxic Mega Cunts while attending Dave’s father’s funeral. However, he eventually joines Kick-Ass and the rest of Justice Forever for the final battle in Time Square. Ass-Kicker formed a duo with Battle Guy…even if the best thing they were able to do was hiding all the time, trying to avoid the Toxic Mega Cunts. While escaping from the battle, Ass-Kicker and battle guy stumbled upon Mother Russia, who was about to kill Hit-Girl. The two boys’ appearance was enough to get Mother Russia distracted for half a second…more than enough for Hit-Girl to capsize the situation and kill her enemy. The police arrived when the battle ended, and Todd was one of the few (the other ones being Dave and Marty) who managed to escape and to avoid arrest. Six months after the battle, he graduated from high school, left his parents’ house and rented an apartment with Dave. He got two part-time jobs, one in a fast food restaurant, the other one in a comicbook store. He kept patrolling the streets as the Ass-Kicker, and always teamed up with Kick-Ass (even if the best job the two accomplished was to arrest Tay Weez, a burglar they found completely drunk and passed out on his own sofa). A hero and an occasional worker, Todd kept fighting for what is right (?) in the new Justice Forever.

A carefree student, a loyal friend and an incurable nerd, Todd Haynes is Dave’s best friend since a very long time. Always with his friend, Todd also follows him in his hero career, even if, as Ass-Kicker, he has less than a few talents to employ. The only thing he’s able to do while donning the costume is hiding somewhere, waiting that his “colleagues” save the day. Proud and willing all the same, the Ass-Kicker is a beloved member of Justice Forever. Despite his costume.

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4 Comments

  1. The Kick-Ass comic does not consistently tell who is Todd and who is Marty. In Kick-Ass 1 Todd is the redhead and Marty is the black-haired one but the names switch places in Kick-Ass 2.

    In the movie #2, Wadlow ruined Todd. The Evan Peters version in Kick-Ass 1 was the best Todd.

  2. […] fashions with no possibility of reply. She was also a classmate of Dave Lizewski and his friends, Todd Haynes and Marty Eisenberg, three total losers she barely considered human beings. Dave, on the […]

  3. […] when he joined the team, and he proved to be quite an unuseful member, until, along with the Ass-Kicker, he managed to do something in the final battle against The Toxic Mega Cunts (actually, […]

  4. […] idiot to fear a little kid. During the battle, anyway, she got distracted by Battle Guy and the Ass-Kicker, and she turned her back to Hit-Girl, her first and last mistake: taking advantage of the moment, […]


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